I know this makes a lot of people uncomfortable but some things really are unforgivable and I think the world would be kinder to survivors to be able to acknowledge that, however difficult. That doesn’t mean the person who did something unforgivable is inherently and permanently evil or inhuman. It doesn’t even mean that they can’t meaningfully change their values and actions going forward. They might have the potential to become someone who is genuinely compassionate and trustworthy. But it means that they have done something which cannot be rectified or healed or fixed. Some things cannot be. They are done and we all must live with it and grieve that it will always be done and can never be undone.
“I’m angry and the only way I know how to cope with this kind of angry is to fade away for a little while until I can figure out how to breathe again without cracking my own ribs.”
